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Militant Breastfeeding Cult

Diary of Tandem Nursing

by Tonia Signor

I had a friend who tandem nursed and was very open about it. I thought that was the strangest thing I'd ever heard of. And I also thought it was grose. I mean really if the child was old enough for solid food he/she was old enough for a tippy cup. And nursing a 2.5 year old yuck! I mean that's a "big" kid...and big kids need to be drinking from big kid cups. Her 2.5 year old that she was tandeming was the same age as my adopted daughter. Who was a "big" girl in my humble opinion.

I was nursing my first breastfed baby of 3 months old. And was highly grossed by her having to remove food from her daughters mouth before nursing her. And I would never do that!

Fastforward 6 months and I was struggling with my nursing my baby a lot! I started surfing the web and came on a excellent resource Breastfeeding.com and got the courage to continue nursing. As I continued to learn about breastfeeding my oldest daughter continued to be fascinated by my nursing.

I realized the bond I had with my youngest and felt remorse over the fact I couldn't have nursed her. I had gotten her at 13 months and so she was drinking cows milk from a bottle. I had briefly attempted nursing my adopted son...but had never considered nursing my toddler...and was very sad that I hadn't had that bonding experience.

I started making online friends with women who had nursed for longer then the standard 1 year period. I soon realized I wouldn't be weaning my 10 month old when she hit one was even considering allowing her to self-wean.

One night my 3.5 year old woke up screaming. She'd had a nightmare and couldn't be consoled. We tried all the normal methods and she continued to sob. I had read about how other moms offer their breastmilk to their older biological children when they were sick etc....I was desperate and wondered if this would work to calm her.

She had asked to breastfeed before...but I was uncomfortable with it, and not sure I was ready for a tandem nursing relationship. This time however my comfort didn't matter all I wanted was her to sleep so we could all go back to sleep. I asked her, "Do you want some mommy milk?" She nodded her head through her tears so I lifted my shirt & let her try to latch on. She latched on like a pro and began to nurse.

I was in awe. The feelings that went me were one of deep love and amazement. She nursed for awhile and then peacefully went to her bed and slept through the night. I did not discuss this with my husband as I had no idea what he would think. All I knew is we were both glad for some sleep.

The next day she asked me if she could have some mommy milk I said yes, and once again she nursed. Her teeth started to hurt me I told her that she had to suck not bite she changed her latch and continued to nurse.

At this stage I had no idea if I wished to continue this or not. I mean what would people think? I myself had thought it was grose with a 2.5 year old she was 3.5. And besides she's not mine by birth only by paperwork. But then I decided she is mine...and I don't care what people think.

I have since nursed her several times. Not everyday. And not often but when she asks I will give it to her.

One night when everybody had colds she woke up again with asthma. This in turn woke up my youngest. So I latched on my youngest while my husband gave the oldest her treatment. She was still distressed, so I pulled her in with me and they both nursed one on each side. This was love. And my heart melted. I will never forget the night my black skinned & vanilla skinned baby nursed side by side. They were mine, and I was giving them a precious gift, and we were bonding in an unbelievable way.

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